Instruments and the people who play them, part I

http://www.marriedtothesea.com/

Is it the person who is drawn to the instrument, or the instrument which choses its player?  In any case, in my experience people who play a certain instrument bear similar qualities.  Note: I've been in three different school bands and draw my generalizations from these.

Flute section: Almost entirely female, save for a lone male flautist.  Never is there more than one guy in the flute section. This guy isn’t gay or a womanizer but just happens to play the flute and do it well. This is the most gossipy section, and of all the band geeks they’ve probably got the best social skills-- they have a lot of friends, enemies and frenemies.

Oboes: In a word: perfectionists.  The oboe is probably the hardest instrument to play.  It takes a lot of discipline to play the oboe properly and reach that level of Purple Face without passing out completely.  Not many oboes in band or orchestra, and usually you have an equal number of male and female oboe players. Usually pretty physically-fit people, but not in a crunchy-granola way.

Bassoons:  Basically a big version of an oboe in terms of tone and playability, probably the second-hardest intrument to play.  Bassoon players are laid-back, groovy and tend to be more of the crunchy-granola type, and generally gay-friendly (I feel it is not a coincidence that the Italian word for bassoon is "fagotto").  I'm very good friends with a bassoon player.

Clarinets:  The nerdiest section, a smart bunch of people.  Pretty even split between the sexes.  Here you will probably find someone who’s also on the math team. The clarinet has five separate parts and requires a lengthy swabbing process to get rid of all the saliva that’s accumulated throughout the instrument--not attractive.  But all that swabbing and disassembling gives a bit more time for clarinetists to talk with each other and form more solid friendships.  First and foremost I am a violinist, but I also play the clarinet. 

Saxophones:  Generally gregarious, usually males slightly outnumber females by 60:40.   Good social skills and likeable personality that toes the line between self-assurance and showing off.  Groovy, able to handle sycopation and rhythm, able to improvise and go with the flow.  Hard to upset.  If athletes, usually play soccer or baseball/softball.

Brass section to be stereotyped in a later post.

image source